Smells Like Teen Nothing #3

I’ve always been fascinated by baseball superstitions — don’t step on the foul line, don’t mention a no-hitter before it’s done, don’t (or do) have sex the day you’re playing, Mark Fidrych talking to the ball and squatting down on all fours to pile up pitching mound dirt just right, Moises Alou urinating on his… Continue reading Smells Like Teen Nothing #3

‘Til the Sea Cows Come Home

Manatees were briefly in the news in recent months on account of wildlife officials successfully convincing some of the ones inhabiting the Atlantic coast of Florida to eat lettuce as a hopefully temporary replacement for the sea grass that pollution has helped deplete 90 percent of — an urgent fix since apparently almost 13 percent… Continue reading ‘Til the Sea Cows Come Home

Aan Aartificial Aardvark

My longtime friend Sara Sherr, who runs karaoke nights in Philadelphia and whose written commentary on music is much missed, on facebook yesterday: “A funny I’m Old moment: on Saturday some young women asked for the Arthur theme and I immediately thought Christopher Cross-Dudley Moore movie, and wondered if 20somethings would still care about that.… Continue reading Aan Aartificial Aardvark

On Classifying Marsupials

When I was a kid, pretty much every zoology book I signed out of the library divided mammals (aka the class Mammalia) into 19 or so orders — 17 placental (giving birth to fully developed and gestated offspring — i.e., carnivores, rodents, cetaceans as in whales); one monotreme (giving birth to eggs — i.e., platypi… Continue reading On Classifying Marsupials

Gnu Zoo Review

Is there a website or app or something that lets you know which animals are in which zoos? Like, where you could write in “numbat” and “San Diego Zoo” and see if one or more live there? Or else maybe just a spreadsheet or whatever that alphabetically lists all the animals on the Y axis… Continue reading Gnu Zoo Review

Choking The Chicken

My Exciting Saturday: Brought home 2 rotisserie chickens from H.E.B, and in the process of taking them apart, decided to break off a succulent little piece and pop it into my mouth. Except turns out it wasn’t so little. Lodged in my throat, and wouldn’t wash down with a glass of water like the hundred… Continue reading Choking The Chicken

Barney review, 1993

Let’s just say I had an eight-year-old, a four-year-old and a two-year-old in the house at the time. Losing my mind, and this jerk didn’t help. Rolling Stone, 11 November 1993